Inner sunrise

The title comes from today's Daily Om...it discussed how when a day is going south, there's the tendency to look to tomorrow as a fresh start, when maybe what you ought to be doing is starting fresh right then and there. A very neat idea.

It's like starting a diet on a Monday...does anyone do that and actually succeed anymore? Leaving out the fact that diets don't work...

Anyway, been thinking about my penchant for lists on this blog, and it brings to mind the joke I coin at the supermarket...about how the problem with those green reusable grocery bags is they only work if you actually remember to bring the blasted things into the store...unfortunately, the same can be said of my lists. I write 'em, I get all fired up while doing so, and then I flatly ignore the blog from then on. We may get some stuff done that's on them, but it's by accident, not because I'm noting things that need to occur thanks to a list. So maybe it's time to rethink the concept, or rededicate myself to actually paying attention to the lists.

I can't even think about moving out of state; it's on the back burner indefinitely. We're in such serious financial straits at present, there's just no point. Jordan's passing knocked our bank account so far in the hole, we're going to need an excavation crew to dig out. I can't be bothered to think about Christmas, because if I do get a bonus this year, it needs to go toward catching up on regular bills, like electric and car, before we even think about buying gifts for people. I don't know how that's going to fly with Husby's family, but I really can't be worried about it, especially since once we get past this holiday hump, we have to start working toward saving for the taxes we'll owe this year.

Baby steps

Closet...nearly set. Repacked it and hung most of our clothes for the first time in about 10 months. Only reason we might have to take stuff back out is because the guys wouldn't take no for an answer regarding spackling up the holes. They'll be back sometime later in the week. Hope they forget.

Mygosh, how great it felt to put stuff on hangers again. Pure laziness that kept it from happening before now, that and the occasional late rent keeping us from wanting to ask the complex for anything. I was able to Goodwill and toss some stuff while the closet was in the bedroom this week, and everything has been better consolidated now. And the floor space in the bedroom! I wanted to lay down on the floor last night and do rug angels.

Found my worktable last Sunday, and Les has been clearing off the floors more with the workers about, so the apartment almost feels livable in places. The cleaner the place, the more room we have, the less scattered my head feels. Just gotta keep it up!

I'm researching other communities in northish South Carolina: Anderson, Clemson, Spartanburg, Rock Hill and the York County area...not ruling out Columbia, just broadening the field a tad.

Seesaw

I'm over here today because I'm frustrated. Pretty sure it's mainly laziness and PMS, but still...not sure how to pull myself up by the ole bootstraps sans motivation. Of course there really is motivation; I'm frickin' buried in it. Positive actions I make in the apartment mean easier, cleaner living conditions; eating better and exercising will make me feel better...everything has a positive light at the end of the tunnel. So what's stopping me?

I'll continue raveling this thread later...there's so little work at work, it's scary...going to surreptitiously check out the classifieds while I'm here.

Off the top of my noggin...

Just got a couple of things going through the ole brainpan...

1. Look for a consignment store that takes furniture.
2. Throw out couch cushions and bookcase.
3. Find that Rodale book on zone planting.
4. Wash out the old litter boxes
5. Make an assessment of how many more pots are needed to break down aloe.
6. Throw out plastic bin.
7. De-rust aerator and spade.
8. Cut the cord on your bike.
9. Make a list of winter/spring planting options.
10. Clean out the corner next to the wing chair in the bedroom and underneath the end table.
11. Tell the complex about the closet hardware (and the 24-hours' notice needed before replacement) Woohoo!

That's plenty for now.

Yeah, well, it was a nice idea....

That concept of getting anything accomplished this past weekend, that is. That funeral Saturday seemed to be ok, I made it through alright, but Sunday brought this emotional shutdown, the likes of which I haven't experienced in ages. I was completely numb, couldn't think about much beyond knitting or napping....have you ever been too depressed to cry? I was there. So I let it happen, and sure enough, as evening rolled around, I noticed a lightening in my mood, just enough to look at the short term and think, ok, I can make it to work tomorrow without wanting to go on the roof with a rifle and take out road ragers for principle's sake...

So nothing got accomplished, and that may not be a bad thing. The concern with mass purging of apartment detritus is the possibility that you'll throw something out that you might actually wish you'd kept later on. I keep looking at those old couch cushions and thinking, geez, they're a pain in the ass. And then I look at them and think, but if I cut about a 1/4 off of each of them, the small pieces would make good cushions for under my neck and back when I'm doing yoga, and the larger ones could be recovered together for a meditation cushion. And sure, that's some work, but the alternative is whining because you don't have a meditation cushion, because everything in our budget right now is assessed according to need, and that'd be WAY down on the list after food, shelter, car, etc. That wouldn't even make a Christmas list really; yet it's something that'd be real nice to have. Priorities.

So those will stay, and I may revisit the crappy bookcase as a source of storage for our DVDs, because we really don't have a place for those right now, and dipping in and out of boxes when we need something isn't the answer.

Fresh weekend and some fresh healing

Middle of the week brought the sad news about my former colleague, Jill, so nothing apartment-wise got accomplished this week after that. I haven't talked to her in years, but it's so soon after Dad, that it's produced a fresh wave of profound sadness and feeling like I'm walking around a bit numb and sans skin. So I've been getting to bed early and giving into comfort foods a bit.

This Saturday, I'll try not to lose the whole day as I attend Jill's funeral and then recover from that. Nothing else planned this weekend, so I hope to at least throw out the old couch cushions, the bookcase, and maybe one coffee table and get some more tidying done.

Fresh week, fresh list

Nice thing about lists...they're not set in stone.

Cleared out the bookcase that held the CDs/DVDs and came to my senses about it...it's getting tossed. We've had it for years, and it's a piece of crap...just not worth keeping around. In true packrat fashion, I thought about keeping the shelves for a moment (for what purpose, I haven't a clue), but came to my senses about that too.

Spent Saturday morning filing paperwork and going through our credit reports, which weren't nearly as scary and depressing as I thought they were. Not by a long shot. Granted the scores could be better, and we're still not in any position to like, move...but the debts that show up on both are manageable (with the exception of last years' repo, and even that isn't hurting us yet the way I thought it would be)....apparently credit reports are a bit backwards, meaning that old $50 debt is going to hurt you more than the $5,000 one. I ain't complaining. Plus my whole report SHOULD get a nice shot in the arm around April of next year (the 10-year mark for my bankruptcy). Or rather it damn well better or I'm gonna be making phone calls.

I learned this weekend what a case of baby steps it is, to tackle 9 years of accumulation in an apartment. Aside from the paperwork, I unpacked 2 boxes, packed and stowed another, unearthed the easy chair from all the papers and crap that've been sitting in it for months. It doesn't seem like much now, but I felt so terrific afterward. Now the key is keeping it up, and it's not that hard, it turns out. Last night, I couldn't find dick on TV, was too restless to knit or read, so I went back to the desk and spent 20 minutes going through some more stuff, simple filing mostly. I'm getting a lot better at managing my time and turning off the tube when necessary.

This week I hope to tackle more of the dining room, as well as the hall closet. I'm also going to cut the cord on the leftover cushions from my old couch.

And another thing.....

Funny thing.....of course nothing's been accomplished yet, but I think I feel a little more settled in my head since writing all those ideas down.

Could be the muscle relaxants too, i guess...

Thought of another category:

Stuff we need from the apartment complex:

1. Repair performed on front screen (bending it straight) so it won't let bugs in.
2. Screen for back window
3. Closet hardware

Fresh list

One thing I can easily reconcile myself to, here in August of '07, is the realization that we ain't moving anywhere out of town for at least another year and a half. Just not possible. Between our usual destitute financial sitch and the taxes we'll owe next year on the stocks we liquidated this year, there's no way we'll be able, short of winning Lotto, to save enough to get the hell out of Dodge (Jax) in the near future. Might be able to move within the city, but we just won't be able to attain the financial stability to move north. Good to recognize it now, I think. Keep my head outta the clouds on that score. Of course it helps that we've had a really mild summer (in my head anyway)...I entered a remarkably tolerant phase where heat and humidity are concerned, somewhere around May 12...not going to knock it or analyze it, just enjoy it while it lasts. Well, not analyzing it is a lie; I know I'm loving the rain whenever/wherever it happens because we had such a dry, destructive spring. But the humidity just hasn't been bothering me...heck, yesterday was about the first day that felt like summer in my book (in August! Your average Floridian would most certainly disagree with me on this score...we've certainly had some "90" days before now.) And the SC trip we took recently recharged me nicely, and in spite of the sucky sleeping arrangements there now, we'll still keep traveling up there about 4 times a year, so...

So what now? Get our current living arrangement more tolerable, that's what, and plan smartly for the future. That means lists, categorizing all the "stuff" in my head. There's so much up there, it oughta leak out my ears, but since it can't, it just gets jumbled and overcrowded and presses against my impatience nerves, where I berate myself for not doing enough until I can't do that anymore, and then I explode and take it out on Husby, which is totally unfair, because while he could do more, he also deals with a helluva lot more pain on a daily basis than I do (my current back issues notwithstanding). He doesn't yell, himself; the guy's so gentle he almost seems spineless (which he's not)...makes it doubly unfair for me to take my frustration out on him. The guy's a human teddy bear, just sits there looking cute and taking abuse.

Where was I? Oh yeah, lists...I'll just start in one room and work my way out. This is for organizing/moving furniture and boxes in the apartment.
1. Dining room

• Finish emptying the CD bookcase, move that bookcase to the bedroom (on top of the coffee table for knitting and religious study books and small altar)
• Fill gaps made from book transfers (to bedroom) with books that are still boxed.
• Box and label the children's books.
• Cull the books again and label the boxes for Chamblin's.
• Decide whether the glass-topped coffee table is worth keeping.
• See if you can get a real table from Mom (is that large one still under their bed, or did Dad's office "acquire" it when he passed?)...price large fold-up tables if the fam can't spare one.
• Toss the corkboard once another table has been acquired.
• Measure where the filing cabinet is, and determine if one of the litter boxes could go there.
• Cull the crap in the boxes currently under corkboard.
• Check easy chair for cat damage and think about patching. See if cushion for said chair needs repair.

2. Living room

• Reorganize the current boxes, find better places for them.
• Decide if one or both of the dust-catching end tables are worth keeping.
• Price large area rugs. (old one should be pulled up and replaced, it's beyond nasty)
• Discuss better placement of computer table. (the digital cable placement forces our hand on this one)
• Inspect all cushions on the couch and make repairs.
• Wash the walls (apartment-wide!)
• Dusting and cleaning out of dragon area and corner next to it.
• Get chest/end table from Mom for possible placement in that corner. (one being used as TV table, Mom's keeping the other for now)

3. Hall closet

• Pull out everything and cull.
• Find room on the shelf for the 2nd cat carrier. (not necessary at this time, it's balancing the worktable/corkboard perfectly with the other boxes)

4. Bedroom

• When bookcase gets moved to on top of coffee table, stash boxes will need to be moved back to near wing chair...hideous pile next to wing chair will need reorganization.
• Space so limited in bedroom, not much needs to be done right now...pull out boxes from under bed and reorganize/cull what's in them.

5. Bathroom (includes dressing area/sink)

• Clean out underneath sink, toss every unnecessary thing.
• Scrub countertop, see if there's anything on the market that can bring up the old haircolor spots.
• Clean mirror, and think about a CFB for above it.
• Scrub bathroom floor, john, and shower.

6. Foyer

This area's a catch-all. I'd like to have only 4 things in this area: the potato/onion bin, and 3 canvas hampers for recyclables.

What's required for this to happen:

• Move tool box to better location
• Move Hubbard House boxes to car for delivery
• Don't let trash sit in this area more than 1 day
• Remember to bring green grocery bags back out to car when you see them there
• Buy canvas hampers, label them, and indoctrinate Husby in their use.

There's SO, SO much else...this is just the physical, apartment-y stuff. There's my environmental studies, which have definitely gotten a shot in the arm with Kingsolver's new book. My dreams of having a farm with a garden and animals are taking on new life with this book. I'm wanting to learn to can vegetables and make my own cheese, and grow things! Which means studying first...I want to find the book I have buried somewhere that talks about the when and where of growing things, and I'm going to study the whole section in the Southern Living cookbook about canning, because I'm scared of the concept and I don't want to be! Those are at the forefront hobby-wise, that and the knitting of course. So many irons in the fire there at present, it deserves its own entry...suffice it to say, I'm working baby stuff right now and will soon go back to the bigger items.

Well, could've been worse

Loathe when weekends go by as quickly as this sucker did. I'm going to start making lists again, so that I have things to cross off when they get accomplished; think it'll help me feel proactive.

Did get 2 biggies done this weekend: laundry, though it was a royal pain because Mom's dryer is basically useless; and moving furniture in the bedroom. There's actual floor space in the bedroom, and it baffles me that it took til Friday night for me to see how easy it would be to create that. I was planning to move the heavy coffee table into the closet, but I started cleaning on Friday night by clearing out all the crap from under the end table (reorganizing, throwing stuff out), and it dawned on me that the coffee table could fit in that spot. Measured the area to confirm this, moved all crap from around both tables onto the bed, and moved the furniture. We plainly have too much furniture for so small an apartment, but most of it is good stuff that we'd rather not throw out or consign, so once Les finds some kind of work, I'm going to look into a small storage unit.

I worked early Saturday, spent Saturday evening at Mom's house doing the laundry, and Sunday was spent with friends, so not as much time as I'd have liked. I'll have to be proactive about how I spend my evenings this week, because I'm pretty sure we're heading to SC this coming weekend for the baptism.

So, what have you done today?

I think I need to start asking myself that. Some time was needed for initial healing, but now that I'm back on both my meds and functioning better, it's time to look at our lives with that longer eye.

I went to an estate planning seminar last night with Mom, sponsored and taught by her attorney. Nice guy, makes it til the end before he really tries to sell you. It was informative and thought-provoking, and I was glad I was there with Mom...she did fine, but admitted afterward that her stomach was one large knot. It's necessary to learn about these things now, but it doesn't make it any easier, so soon after Dad. And the session reminded me of some things I probably learned in college, but had forgotten, like how every state is just a little different, so if you draw up a living trust in Florida and then move to say, SC ::grin::, you'll need to make sure it applies properly to the SC state laws once you've settled, so you can avoid probate or worse if something catastrophic happens.

Then this morning I'm goofing off on the Crafters Choice website (mmmmm, knitting books!), and in their clearance section, they have a CDROM offer for Suze Orman's Will & Living Trust kit. What the frick is that doing on a crafters website? Looks promising, may purchase in the near future, plus I believe in signs, so I'm thinking that I need to revisit the subject, and soon.

Sent away for and received info for Spartanburg (not so thorough) and York County (Rock Hill area - better)...ran both our credit reports for reference purposes, and will try to make the time to decipher those this weekend. There's a lot on the plate for this weekend though. Furniture moving, because we're inheriting some stuff from Mom, which means possible consignment or sale of stuff we already have (example: this'll bring our grand total of coffee tables up to 4! 800 square foot apartment, folks! But we're not packrats...). Even Les is starting to complain...so I think I'm going to have to strip and refinish the coffee table I like in order to justify keeping it. Or look into storage facilites finally.

We're mailing Les's SS disability paperwork this weekend, and he's on a new med that actually has him feeling human, so if it stays that way, it'll be easier to nag him into part-time work at least. He went to 2 job opps this week, which is more than I usually get him to, so I'm hopeful. In the meantime, I'm also reconciling myself to the idea of him only doing part-time work in the near future, and god willing, going back to school. It'll be very hard, especially when we're trying for kids down the road, but as long as we're together...

Kids on hold til end of year; trying to stabilize health, lose a few pounds. My BP was up of late, but I got that stabilized with a diuretic from my doc.

All this furniture, combined with the issues of living in a very old apartment with a fairly uncaring management staff, has me thinking more about house rental when we move. So I hope to make some lists, write some things down this weekend, just beginner's thinking of how we can make this move work once we've got our credit under control. That wasn't as bad as I thought; Les's end of it only has 1 Fair (2 Goods!), but we're both too low on the scale for your average landlord or credit institution to take seriously still.

So it's Friday, and I can't wait to go home and clean, move furniture around. It's been so long since we've had closet hardware, I'm not sure I care about getting it replaced at this point, at least not until we delete some of this furniture and STUFF! There are still several (a generous term) boxes that need to be unpacked, reorganized, repacked...I know I'm still keeping clothes and bags I'll never wear again. This weekend will be spent doing laundry and THAT!

Week of 6/25/07

1. Unpack and repack boxes; organizing, labeling, and cataloging

Hello Little Blog!

So sorry for the neglect. I swear I haven't given up on the idea of moving to the Carolinas. It just got postponed by bad credit, and well, I couldn't be happier with that development now, as it allowed me to be in Florida without complications during the rather life-altering loss of my Papa. I can't imagine being anywhere right now except close to my mom and Lil Bro, and in decent proximity to Lil Sis. My heart has been ripped to shreds, and the shreds have been run over by a tank, and I know it's comparable for them as well. This is where I need to be for now.

However, it's time to shift mindsets again, because the ensuing chaos of a family member's demise served to make the apartment even more unliveable than usual. We threw stuff out, boxed stuff up, and then the floor dropped out symbolically on the whole move. So now we half live out of boxes, and we still never got the complex to install the new closet hardware, so the clothing storage sitch is a clusterf*ck. I kept pieces of my old couch that we simply don't have the room for, and there's a wealth of crap in boxes that still needs to be downsized. I consider myself heading in the right direction because I've managed to keep the kitchen clean for several days in a row this week, but it's a drop in the bucket when you look at the whole place. I mean, we're not exactly social butterflies, but I'd love the option of inviting someone over sometime, without feeling like I was sending them into a condemned building.

So first up is to make the apartment liveable. While I'm/we're doing that, I'll also be researching other cities and towns in SC and NC, to make sure we're making an informed decision in where we want to live. Because it's still going to happen, but there's other towns that pique my interest too besides Columbia...from an online standpoint, Spartanburg, Asheville, and Winston-Salem, to name a few. Gotta do my homework first. It may take another year or two now, especially when we caught up on our bills with the stock money, only to have Dad's death put us behind again as we exercised some loose spending in the weeks following...unavoidable expenditures, I'm not berating myself - I mean, when your Dad's just died, the last thing you want to be thinking about is money; but the key now is to get it back under control and start saving. Les is looking for work, and I may too, because Dad's death served to punctuate how completely boring my job is, and how I hate contributing to what I consider the lowest-common-denominator of capitalism. Ideally I'd like to find something full time with bennies that I don't loathe, while keeping WSP as a part-time gig from home. In Melanie's world.....

So anyway, first up this weekend is the dining room, which has become a cat-litter-strewn catch-all area in the last 2 months. Time to unpack and reorganize the books, make a box for Chamblin's, and set up my desk over there again. I want to set up the sewing machine, move some stuff around, unpack boxes that don't need to be packed, and designate a specific storage area of the apartment for the ones that are fine as is. We need to move the phone to a more accessible area, and possibly use some of the boxes we have left over as storage vessels for stuff like DVDs, CDs, etc. I'm starting to go bananas not having decent access to my books, so this area's definitely getting SOME attention this weekend. Probably won't end up being nearly as much as I want, but the work will also be a nice distraction to take my mind off goddamn Father's Day.

Why Columbia?

Been asking that question here and there since the move fell through. It's not that I think we were settling on Columbia, although that definitely would've been the case if we'd actually gotten the housing. The complex itself was fine, but it really was our only choice, thanks to our financial sitch. And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with Columbia - far from it - the city proper is really pretty and it's a true college town, which I love. It's centrally located...see, that's one of the things that's frustrating me now...if we wanted to explore the Carolinas further (for pleasure and potential living), up there it'd be a day trip. From here, it's a weekend. And I'm aching to explore right now (which isn't even possible at present because Jordan has become a canned food cat so we can't leave him for any stretch of time). But it gets me thinking, am I sure Columbia's our next move? I think it is. At least we have the time now to make sure.

We interrupt this blog for the following announcement.....

Shit.

We return you now to your regularly scheduled blog.

You ever have those moments when you tell yourself, I'm not going to let Murphy's Law control my life!, and then Murphy comes along and f*cks you up the ass anyway?

So we're sticking around Jacksonville a while longer. I'll probably be ignoring this blog for a while out of bitterness, and then I'll probably revamp it to reflect how we're improving our lives right here in Jax, but for now, check out Ember's Lighthouse to read about my fascinating life of friends, fiber, and food.

EEEERRRRR!@#$%^%@$^%&^%*&^(&*()(^)_)+!!!

::boom!::

That was the sound of our moving plans (god willing, temporarily) crashing to a halt.

I'm pissed. No wait, I'm livid. Mainly with myself though...should've seen this coming.

Allowing small mope, but I'm already in repair mode, emailing and exploring alternatives.

More to come...

This week

1. Don't spend the tax return on crap.
2. Call Quail Hollow to touch base.
3. Plan a visit to SC for before the move.
4. Pack more.
5. Get the blasted city of Columbia jobs paperwork mailed.

That still hasn't been done, but in my defense, I've emailed at least half a dozen applications and resumes each to the Lexington Medical Center and USC. So #3 on that list might get delayed a bit too, because really, another trip to Columbia might depend on whether or not there's a need for Husby or I to interview anywhere.

In spite of the fact that VERY little got accomplished move-wise this past week, I feel we're still in a good place logistically. My foot issues really knocked me for a loop, and I had to work a bit on Saturday, and I let it throw me, but for some reason I don't begrudge myself relax time of late, so I guess it was necessary. Besides, I got a pretty hat out of some of that relax time :)

Busy.......Scary........Packing.........

1. Mail stock info today.

Going to the post office to do that, which is probably idiotic because it's an in-town office, so I doubt it'll get there much faster, but I really want this expedited. Les made the comment that we should wait on the stock price to rise, but there's no way to know if it's going to fluctuate in the coming weeks so I shot that idea down. As IPO's go, it hasn't risen above its open price in a couple of months, so we're just going to have to take what we can get.

Spent the weekend packing and knitting a hat, with these weird lulls where my blood sugar was down...I haven't been eating right again. This weekend was more reorganizing or consolidating than it was packing IMO, though things definitely made it into boxes. But I was a girl about it too....filled these 2 old TV boxes with clothes, blankets, miscellaneous crap with the idea of putting them in our walk-in closet afterward to have them out of the way..........only to discover that the boxes were too damn large to fit through the blasted doorway. And I'd emptied this huge plastic Rubbermaid storage vessel with the intent of throwing it away, because I can't stand the thing, the lid has never fit, and it's so big it's unwieldy, only to have us both decide that it would be great for moving couch pillows and other light stuff, so maybe just for the move and then we'll throw it out........I still haven't decided if that's rationalizing or rational.

Which gets me thinking about how if I'm able to pack so much stuff a full 6 weeks early without us going out of our minds tearing into boxes every other day to find something or other that we need, what does that say about the level of crap that we own that we don't really use?

So many little things

Mom said today that getting ready for the move must be exciting and scary. Those 2 simple adjectives pretty well nail it. There's so many little things to address. We have large water and electric bills to deal with, and we can't pay rent until we address the water bill, which sucks. I mailed the tax return, and will now try to forget that I've taken care of it, so that when the money shows up in our account, it'll be a pleasant surprise. I faxed the application package to Quail Hollow, and am playing phone tag with their manager, to find out if we need to send a security deposit to hold our space on a waiting list for top of May, which we don't have at this time. And we've let the home phone lapse, probably for good, because that's a bill that just has to take a back seat to the others. All the money issues are a little overwhelming, but we're doing our best.

I'm packing books and tapes and stuff where I can, and trying to organize the house a little. I'm shopping for medical insurance up there, and putting together my application for city jobs, and I still need to deal with the paperwork for the stock options. Those things will occur this week; it's just everything went on hold yesterday so we could celebrate our anniversary :) 8 years married, almost 10 as a couple. Life is good!

Where'd February go?

Seriously. I mean, I know it's a short month, but holy crap!

Quick status report:

1. Paperwork nearly set to fax to Quail Hollow. Cross your fingers.
2. Will complete paperwork this weekend regarding exercising stock options.
3. Tax return has been mailed. Since we need it so badly, I don't expect it to come nearly as quickly as it did last year.
4. Found the packing tape!!! Will be boxing and reorganizing this weekend, and hopefully throwing out at least the couch.
5. Finishing resume, drafting cover letter for park ranger job; application mostly complete.

When I spoke to the Quail Hollow folks yesterday, they mentioned having exactly what we need and want around the first week of May: a 2 br flat downstairs unit. Can't think about it too hard, because it makes me nutty that I can't do more to secure it at present. Once everything's faxed, I'll feel a little better.

Too much to do!

Cleaning house

The area under Les's dragon table (place where he keeps his dragons) is clean. However that means there are piles of excrement on my couch, his couch, and the floor around it. Will box most of that for him to go through, and move onto the end table next to it. Gotta prod him about those end tables; I'm not crazy about them. Storage facilites or catch-alls? It's a grey area. I don't want to think about the dust I'll kick up just reorganizing the crap in them.

We're back to the mindset of throwing out my couch. Been using the other furniture in the house this week in his absence, and sonofagun, it's comfortable in its own right. Also still operating under the delusion that I'll throw out 2 monitors, all the newspapers and crap in the foyer, and move the computer to the dining room table. Ideally, this weekend (gotta have something to do between Super Bowl commercials); realistically, by the time he gets back (hopefully!) Wednesday.

Also planning to send in applications, pay stubs, etc., and security deposit for Quail Hollow next week when I get paid, in the hopes of getting on a waiting list. Cross your fingers for us! With the water bill still kind of outstanding, we may need to do some tapdancing.

SC January 27

I think we may have found a new home.

Really, it's more a case of process of elimination. Of the 5 AIMCO properties in the Columbia area:
1. Pine Haven Villas—no washer/dryer connections at all, and income restricted
2. West Winds—2 BR townhouses at 854 square feet?! That's a joke, right?
3. Riverwind @ St. Andrews—Snore. Low square footage for 2 br flats. Old appliances. Snore. No grilling on the microscopic decks. Next to no storage. Snore.
4. Essex Park—Creepy. Right next to Riverwind, but completely different exterior layout. Low square footage for 2 br flats. Very likely no W/D connections in 2 br. Ethnically challenging neighborhood.
Oh, I know, they're all going to be ethnically challenged; Columbia is 50/50 black/white. We're not racist; what I mean is we'd rather not have the gang-bangers actually living in our complex, and we got that feeling just from driving around. Can't be comfortable someplace, if you're always questioning your safety.
5. Quail Hollow— :)
We hit that one first, simply because it was the first one of the five as you drive toward Columbia from Aiken. Just off of US 378 in West Columbia, we wound through a subdivision of NICE houses and hilly roads to get to Quail Hollow. Got the girl to show us a TH, but we'll probably have a better shot at a flat come April. The THs run 1158 SF, the flat's are about 1200. 2 brs, washer/dryer connections, screened porches, older complex with good upkeep, 24-hour maintenance, courtesy cop on premises, brick exterior, and rates from $569 to $629. That bowled Les over, I think; we're paying $610 now for our 800 SF pit...he turned to me as we were touring the TH, looked me in the eye, and said, "I like this one." We hate putting our eggs in one basket, but we both knew from the moment we got a good look around. Plus since we're currently in an AIMCO property, they have something called Coast-to-Coast Transfer, which basically means waiving the app. fees. and security deposit and sliding right in. Thank God!

We cruised a bit more of the Irmo/St. Andrews area, and got to spend time with his Lil Sis, which was really nice. We hit the new age shop she frequents (small, but very nice...you know how you walk into some new age shops and can tell right away that they specialize in crap? Not this place; they obviously care about what they put on the shelves. I look forward to giving them more of my money :) Les and I already have anniversary or birthday ideas for each other from that place. And we grabbed a bite at Cool Beans, that coffee shop that's frequented by the campus crowd because it's like, right down the street from the horseshoe of USC. I had a blast! I get such a buzz from being around stressed-out people with laptops :)

Now what? Let's get crackin' and packin'! This trip was a shot in the arm for us both, I can tell. I have to iron out one or two things with the leasing office, but once that's done, we'll put the applications in with Quail Hollow to get ourselves on the list for end of April/top of May. I'm talking to the office about the closet and sink as well, and I'll start tearing through some areas of the apartment this week to keep myself busy while Husby is in SC.

Addendum to the weekly priorities

Sink issue carrying over til Monday (I just love watching money drip down the drain), couch is on the back burner again as I fantasize about slipcovering and recovering it, and we're probably only doing 1 actual day in Columbia. That's ok though. I'm not ready to inquire about work up there yet; that was a pipe dream. Still have to fill out the application and copy it X number of times depending on how many I'm sending in, update the resume, and write cover letters. This visit is more about housing: if the AIMCO communities are feasible at all, and what the costs are, associated with living in those areas (utilities, high-speed Internet, cable, W/D rental, etc.) Either way, it's another chance to drive around and get more familiar with the area. Another reason why it's important that it's just Les and I; he can drive and I can take the passenger seat or vice versa. If his Mom came, she'd need the passenger seat because she gets carsick, but you don't get nearly the clear vantage point from the backseats that you do in the front, so if she tries to tag along, I'm putting my foot down. I want shotgun this trip.

Scouting Trip #1

Priorities this week:

1. Clean kitchen thoroughly, especially around and under sink, so that we can call the complex about the leak. Blasted kitchen faucet has graduated from steady drip to dribble. While we're at it, lean on them about the frickin' closet hardware.

2. Make a specific plan of where we're going on Friday and Saturday, and what information we hope to glean from the visit.

Leaving Thursday night. That's a biggie; if we put it off til Friday morning, Husby won't want to do nearly as much sightseeing on Friday, because we'll have just done 5 hours in the car getting up there. Also, figuring out how to politely, but firmly keep his mother from coming with us. She spends her weeks dealing with Grandma and Kylie, so she could crave an escape, but it would slow us down in a big way if she came with, so I'm going to gently keep stressing a specific plan of action for Friday and Saturday. Les has said that he doesn't want her with us this time either, but he's her son, so saying no ain't exactly a strong suit either.

And this ain't a pleasure trip; I've got plans. If we get done with the AIMCO apartment complexes early, then I'll want to check out Les's campus, then I'll want to look at the southside of town between I77 and Fort Jackson because it looks affordable and close to town while not so citified, then I'll want to breeze past some houses that I'll have highlighted simply for their rent rates, so that we can get a look-see at what money buys up there, then...and that's not counting hitting city hall to pick someone's brain on applying for the positions I see online and the Chamber of Commerce, because they were closed when we went there last time, and...

Cleared one hurdle this past weekend...the papasan made it to the dumpster! Of course, this meant that the couch was clear enough to sit on, which means having 2nd thoughts about getting rid of that too, because it really is a comfortable couch when you get right down to it. But we plain don't have the room, and I don't want to move it up there only to realize that we don't have the room for it there either. Another thing that makes it so appealing is how you can lean back a bit when you're sitting in it. Both the long couch and the chairs that we have are really straight-backed furniture, which I'm sure is great for the posture, but could be better from a comfort standpoint. But my couch is all torn up from the cats, and I know it'll be SUCH a relief when it's out of that spot and we can put the easy chair in its place. Just gotta keep thinking about that...

So this week, plan for the scouting trip and try to keep from alienating his mom. Small order. Going to crawl under the bed now...

Yeah, well, the best laid plans...

Forgot my meds not 1, not 2, but 3 evenings in a row last week, so that list I made on the 8th is carrying over to this week, big time. It was totally by accident, no conscious self-sabotage here, but as a result, I spent the weekend doing a lot of sleeping and feeling like crap.

Talked with Husby about a scouting trip on the last weekend in January, and I got that Friday off.

Begin at the beginning

Yeah, ok........where exactly would that be? It's a significantly overwhelming prospect, putting your life in order and into boxes. I gathered all the stray paper in the dining area on Saturday, bills and such, sorted it, and succeeded in creating a new, albeit smaller pile, which then got ignored on Sunday because I treated myself to church and then felt out of whack the rest of the day, because I haven't been to church in like, a year. Glad I went, intend to go back some more before we escape, but I was at loose ends the rest of the day.

Things to do this week (this includes the coming weekend):

1. File that pile.

2. Toss the rest of the newspapers in the foyer. (a husby job)

3. Get the kitchen clean and keep it that way. (a joint husby-wifey job)

4. Toss the papasan chair...I've cut the cord on this sucker. Called 2 thrift-type places but they won't take it without the cushion, which makes sense. Besides, while it was the first piece of furniture I bought on my own, it also represents a pretty lousy time in my life. It'll be therapeutic, tossing it into the dumpster.

5. Toss the couch. Still wrapping my mind around this one...haven't sat on the blasted thing in months because we put the papasan chair on top of it when we inherited the wing chair from Terra (my knitting chair in the bedroom—sweet!). And it is still sooooooo comfy to sit on, so if I sit on it, it'll make it harder to cut the cord. But it needs to go, because we also have a matching 3-cushion couch with slightly oversized wing chair set taking up space in the living room, and if you've gotta choose, keeping the nice matching stuff makes much more sense. That chair is kick-ass to sit in for gaming, and it just makes sense to have a long couch in a living room, for hanging out and for company. We just plain don't have the room for the extra couch, and I don't see our sitch changing that much for the next year or three, so why move it up there? I've had delusions of putting a slipcover on it and redoing the pillows, but it still comes down to not having the room. The cats have torn it up on both sides, so again, thrift stores won't touch it, so I'm going to keep the pillows and cushions (for the cats and our bed, and to keep up the delusion/dream of recovering them) and toss the body.

6. Rearranging the dining area, i.e. putting the computer back on the dining room table, moving the boxes around, and tossing the corkboard. The cats have torn up part of that sucker too, and I really want the computer back on a sturdy surface. We don't eat off the dining room table right now anyway.

That only looks like a lot because I'm long-winded, so I'll also be starting lists this week. Unfortunately, it looks like we won't be updating the MS Windows XP anytime soon, so I've got to figure some stuff out longhand, which is fine. It'll take longer, but probably will make more sense in my head, when I'm looking at lists on paper as opposed to on screen. When you buy a Dell, you get what, 3 months of everything free? And then you still need to buy the MS stuff, like Word, Excel, and Powerpoint. Well, our 3 months was up before Christmas, but of course, we don't have the spare dough.

What kind of lists? If we can afford a first wave of boxes, how many and what size? Should we try to make the boxes all common sizes? Should we go through the stuff that's already in boxes, try to break it down further? Need to go to the office with the paperwork from when they tried to evict us, because I'm 90% sure that never got cleared up on the county court end, which means we could be trying to move with an incorrect eviction on our record...so gotta give them copies of our stuff to give to their lawyers and straighten it all out. As soon as we're up to date on the water bill, gotta approach the company about grandfathering into one of their other complexes. Gotta hit Columbia again and peruse all 5 of the AIMCO complexes for feasibility. Gotta find out how soon I can get financial aid info from Midlands Tech for the '07-'08 school year. Gotta finish the blasted SS paperwork, as well as the WIA paperwork, and send in the SS stuff.

So I've got a few things on my mind. Lists and writing it down further will help organize these thoughts and not make me so crazy about them.